| Nominee: | Bill Bennett |
| Education: | Williams College, University of Texas (PhD in Philosophy), Harvard School of Law |
| Occupation: | Pompous, Moralizing High-Roller |
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Moral policeman Bill Bennett apparently accumulated a massive gambling debt. |
William Bennett received his Ph.D. in philosophy in 1967. At the time he was a liberal Democrat. Even though he managed to avoid being drafted, at least he was avoiding a war he didn't believe in, unlike many of our other, more cowardly and blatantly hypocritical nominees. In fact, Bennett at one point even considered joining SDS. He was advised against joining by his brother, Bob, who later went on to become Bill Clinton's lawyer.
Anyway, his first teaching job was at the University of Southern Mississippi, where he included Martin Luther King's "Letter from a Birmingham Jail" as part of the reading material for his classes. He taught his students that "there may be no better exegesis on just and unjust laws than is found in that Letter." Apparently this did not endear him to the college administration. After one year his teaching contract was not renewed. So far, so good.
While at Harvard Law School, Bennett became increasingly conservative, while most other people were headed in the other direction (this was 1969). But it wasn't until 1986 that Bennett finally became a card carrying Republican. It seems the Democrats weren't moving to the Right fast enough for him.
Since Bennett is actually a smart, highly educated guy who can remember what it was like to have a conscience, he stands out from his fellow Reaganites. He's the guy they go to for advice on how to handle embarrassing situations like when Trent Lott lets slip that he's not only a racist - but he doesn't care who knows it. Most Republicans can only come up with "Gee - I thought we weren't supposed to let on!" But Bennett can, with a straight face, actually say stuff like, "the Republican legacy on race has more positive than negative to offer". He manages to distract attention away from the bald fact that confirmed racists feel perfectly comfortable in the Republican party, and that the Republican party is, in turn, perfectly comfortable with them - as long as they are sufficiently circumspect. He does this by quoting Dr. King, Abraham Lincoln, and Thurgood Marshall, and by explaining that Republicans who vote against civil rights legislation are morally superior to Democrats who vote against civil rights legislation. You've gotta have a Ph.D. to come up with B.S. like that.
So Bennett managed to carve out a niche for himself as a pompous moralizer, even by Republican standards. He wasn't satisfied with just writing a book entitled "The Book of Virtues," he had to top that with "The Children's Book of Virtues." "The Book of Virtues," by the way, has been made into an animated series. Naturally, he devoted an entire book to condemning Bill Clinton for his "reckless personal life." He also has a book devoted to condemning single parents, gay marriage, cohabitation, and other deviations from the ideal of the nuclear family as the "foundation of society" (the book is called "The Broken Hearth: Reversing the Moral Collapse of the American Family").
The most recent addition to this oeuvre is his "Why We Fight: Moral Clarity and the War on Terror". The two main theses of this book are (1) Western Civilization is superior to Islamic Civilization because in Western Civilization we have a greater capacity for self-criticism, and (2) Western Civilization should stop criticizing itself.
The best part of it is that it turns out that Bill Bennett, like all good pompous moralizers, is a big fat hypocrite. You see, he loves to gamble. And I don't mean that he loves to back dark-horse political candidates. And I also don't mean that he chips in on the office pool during the World Series. I mean he loves to go to Las Vegas and Atlantic City and place bets. Big bets. It turns out that the same guy who charges $50,000 a pop to deliver a lecture on morality, will take that money and put it all on "lucky 7". Bennett won't say exactly how much money he's spent on his private vice - except to insist that it's less than $8 million! But according to Newsweek magazine, Bennett once wired $1.4 million to a single casino. Bennett's current "situation" predates his candidacy for the Golden Jackbook award.
The Golden Jackboot™ Award is a Goering-Goebells Production, a
subsidiary of Reichstag Enterprises (otherwise known as the DC Anti-War
network). |
THE NOMINEES
Learn more about the nominees by
following the links to their bios.
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VOTE NOW
Voting ends Tuesday, July 8, 2003.
The winner shall be announced Tuesday
at Bossa Bistro and Lounge,
2463 18th St NW, 7 to 10 PM!
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